Ugly Sweaters Galore

Sage with naughty sign

The truth about Sage emerged at the Augusta Friends of the Library’s “Ugly Sweater” Christmas party.

After a few weeks of holiday chaos–and a round of technical difficulties with my work website that made me seriously consider becoming Amish–I’m finally ready to post again. My subject: Ugly Sweaters.

The Augusta Friends of the Library hosted an Ugly Sweater party at the Beaver Bowl last night. Would anyone come? Questionable. Did I want to help anyway? To be honest, not really–by the time I get home, I’m ready to shut down socially. But do I love the library and want to support it? Heck, yeah!

So I volunteered to bring plates, napkins, and candy. Easy enough. I also volunteered to bring some items for the silent auction, a fundraiser for the Friends that would hopefully raise some money despite the party itself being free. Fortunately, I had a box full of dishware from my grandma that had no particular sentimental value but was still too pretty to just get rid of. I bought several dozen rosettes and cookies from the Augusta Bakery to put on them and voila–instant auction items!

I was worried that the forecast snow would prevent anyone from coming, but Sage and I dutifully showed up to help set up anyway. (Sage wasn’t terribly enthusiastic, but the promise of cookies and a dinner of greasy bowling alley food was enough to bribe him.)

Fortunately, we’re hardy Wisconsinites here, so the turnout was decent, although it consisted mostly of devoted library patrons rather than curious “civilians.” But we had fun anyway. There were lots of games, and Sage tried them out.

Cuter Sage scooping cotton balls

Sage played a game that involved scooping “snowballs” with a spoon. He was quite proficient given his ability to find loopholes in the rules.

Sage punching sad snowman

Sage strategically placed carrots on the “Tape the Carrot on the Snowman” game so the poor snowman looked distraught, then attacked it as Sadie, one of Augusta’s fine librarians, looked on. I don’t know what Freud would say about this.

Sage attacking cookie

Sage continued his violent rampage when he attacked the “ugly sweater” cookie he decorated.

Sadie and Sage with reindeer horns

Sage and Sadie also posed for quite a few pictures in the “picture frame.”

I was thrilled that all my silent auction contributions sold, so A) I helped out the library and B) I didn’t have to haul any dishware home. But my crowning glory came when, contrary to all my expectations, I won the “Ugliest Sweater” prize. (I was wearing a black snowflake sweater from my mom underneath a holiday sweater vest lent for the cause by my dear friend Angie.) I felt a little guilty because some of the little girls had created elaborate sweaters, whereas I had put virtually no effort into my get-up. Unfortunately, their sweaters were just too darn tasteful, and at least they got other prizes like “Most Colorful.” And hey–if I’m generally devoid of fashion sense anyway, at least I have something to show for it!

Me holding ugly sweater prize

Me holding my surprisingly attractive “Ugliest Sweater” prize

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One comment

  1. Choice quote: “. . . a round of technical difficulties with my work website that made me seriously consider becoming Amish.” However, the younger generation uses cellphones and computers galore. Ha! Sage sure knows how to surround himself with beautiful including his mama.

    By the way, I remember the scooping snowballs game played at my daughter’s 16th birthday party. Blindfolded, I think.

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